i've been hearing people ask, myself included, things like if you are X can you be considered Y? (e.g., if you experience [thing] are you ace? if you're NB are you trans?)

and i think the short answer is: well, what do you think?

my take on it (and disclaimer i'm not NB), is that if you've done enough to research, listen to, and understand the experience and after that, feel like that label fits you, then i think you should allow yourself to. is it helpful to you? does it sit right with you? and maybe you will think differently tomorrow than you did today, and that's totally ok.

and sometimes labels fit you that are seemingly at odds or contradictory to each other. and to that i say embrace the chaos lol. while it doesn't seem like it initially, i think for one, these aren't binary on and off switches that zero sum. and two, this is a really interesting opportunity to see what happens when you multiply them together, could it point to something more precise for you, or put a label on something that sat in the middle somewhere?

for example i've been thinking lately about whether you could be aro + poly, and what could that look like? from that how can i compare previous relationships i have and identify the things i was pressured to box into because of society, vs. how it could work with more loose guidelines, and how does that affect how i approach things from here?

seems like a lot of questions lead to more questions. it's ok to take a break from it. and at the end of the day, you're in control of the twine game here.